20 THINGS YOU SHOULD'VE LEARNT BY NOW
Don't worry about what people think, they don't do it very often.
Going to church doesn't make you a Christian anymore than standing in a garage makes you a car.
Eat well, stay fit, die anyway.
If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you've never tried before.
It is easier to get forgiveness than permission.
If you look like your passport picture, you probably need the trip.
Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of cheques.
A conscience is what hurts when all of your other parts feel so good.
A balanced diet is a biscuit in each hand.
There is always one more imbecile than you counted on (erm... not guilty! lol).
By the time you can make ends meet, they move the ends.
It's not the jeans that make your bum look fat.
People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.
Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.
You will never find anybody who can give you a clear and compelling reason why we put the clocks back.
There comes a time when you should stop expecting other people to make a big deal about your birthday. That time is age eleven.
The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age,gender, religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we ALL believe that we are above average drivers.
Your friends love you anyway.
Never be afraid to try something new. Remember that a lone amateur built the Ark. A large group of professionals built the Titanic.
And lastly,when reading this, someone WILL go back and check to see if this is number 20 !!
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